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Greenwashing your Pregnancy

NOUN

noun: greenwashing

disinformation disseminated by an organization so as to present an environmentally responsible public image:

"the recycling bins in the cafeteria are just feeble examples of their corporate greenwash"

    I am currently pregnant with my third child my first two which are now identical four year old twin boys. I was so excited to be pregnant with a third baby and the topper...it was only one baby.  In my head I could leap tall building being pregnant with only one baby, go skiing, go snowshoeing, and manage my very busy family, household, and my company Clearwater Canoeing. I mean it was just one baby, then couch ridden nausea for six months straight, bed rest, high blood pressure, gestational diabetes, heart burn and still very active twin boys.  Lets just say I have had to step back and I may have had to let a few things go.  I am very proud of the two times I got my snowshoes on and I have now become very proud of the times I have made it to my shower. 
   I know I am not the only mom out there that has been hit with a difficult pregnancy or just a busy life in general so in defense of those who may want to judge my current situation (including me) here are my top five greenwash reasons for my current state of affairs.

1)  My living room is an explosion of toys and I cannot get off couch for lack of energy or fear of vomiting. Visions of my children growing up to being hoarders because they grew up in this living room are now taking over my mind due to uncontrollable hormone surges.

Greenwash-  I am a mom who believes in creative play with no rules or judgements. As a parent the fact that my kids need every toy they own to build a trap for a ghost is just budding geniuses working on engineering degrees.  Who am I to stand in the way of creativity? Yes that's why my living room is a disaster...I am just that good of a mom.

2) I have fallen off the face of the planet as far as visiting friends, attending board meetings, participating in general because my current state of affairs has made travelling or concentrating very limited.  I feel out of touch and I miss human adult communication!

Greenwash-I am just taking some time for introspection, meditation, and creating a stress free space for the new life I am creating.  It is in the best interest of the baby and my family for me to bond with the new life I am growing and its what I feel is the best right now. Yes this is what I tell myself longingly catching up on emails and minutes of meetings I cant attend.

3) My need and ability to shave have fallen to the wayside-its winter right?

Greenwash-  I am proud of armpit hair!  It says I do not believe in societies rules for beauty!

4) My hair hasn't been washed in lets say almost a full moon cycle and that would also mean I have had limited time for showers and no make up in a while.

Greenwash- I am trying the new no shampoo revolution to protect my baby and my body from harmful carcinogens and chemicals found in most personal hygiene products.  Its not that I don't have time its just that I am so very environmentally aware.

5)  I am drinking out of mason jars and giving the kids cereal in sour cream containers because I ran out of dishes and have not wanted to even look at my sinks. My laundry may have started to pile high enough to declare themselves sovereign nations.

Greenwash-I am using mason jars and sour cream containers because mason jars are the new shabby chic and the containers are my 'I recycle everything' statement makers. I would do my dishes and laundry but I ran out of biodegradable soap and I have to make some more. Pinterest has so many good make your own laundry soap, dish soap, and dishwasher tabs.


So there you have it!  If you feel down, wish you could do more, enviously stare out your window at people getting in vehicles to do tasks like get mail and go for coffee, remember you are just an environmental, green, super cool, fighting societies rules, parent for a new generation of super kids.  Yes this is what I tell myself and anybody else who braves our home to visit.